Why do we hate our body?
How about this morning. Rub your belly? Did you pull open your P.J.’s? Then take a sideways look in the mirror? Did you think twice about breakfast?Wonder if you should cut back on calories today? How many outfits did you try? To get the one that looks good.
Did you go shopping the past week? Feel exasperated because cloths just don’t fit. There way you like them to. The way you want to look. Time to go up in size or did you squeeze in? Be honest. Do you love your body?
Well, Statistics say. 97% of women, at some time during their day don’t.
What is it really about? Is it about the body at all? Or is it a body image problem.
When we have a body image problem. It is probably not about the weight. It is the thoughts inside our head. The ones that beat us up. And create self-loathing. Our inner critic that says, I’m not perfect.
First off. Perfection is overrated! It’s a dangerous slippery slope. Perfection keeps us looking towards the future. But Missing the present! Perfection is a sign. We are out of balance. For whatever reason.
Many times, perfection has it’s roots in Emotional baggage. Negatively driving our thoughts, behavior and dominating our life! Often it has nothing to do with the body. Consider hating our bodies is first a mental emotional struggle.
Why do 97% of women hate their bodies? Peer pressure or unrealistic advertising. Bullying overweight children and adults. Judgmental people or emotional scars left by careless unkind words. There may be a plethora of reasons. None of which begin with food. After-all 97% of women are NOT extremely over-weight. Some only carrying a few extra pounds.
We understand that Obesity is different than carrying a few extra pounds. But obesity is huge. It has reached epidemic proportions in North America. And obesity comes with many dangers. High blood pressure. Heart disease. Diabetes. Reduced immune function means getting more colds and flues. The list goes on and on.
But it’s not just the body that hurts. Psychological issues. Dissatisfaction, even self-loathing. Being overweight can lead some to underachieve. To not trying new things. Because self-esteem suffers. Could be childhood baggage and trauma. But for many is is disillusionment. Searching for a deeper meaning and feeling dis-satisfied. A lack of knowing who we are at the deepest level of our existence.
Hating our bodies or hating our lives?
Psychology states, whenever we feel unhappy about something. Whether it is about weight or otherwise. The answers lie inward. When we feel unhappy. Look inward. And looking inward can lead us to look at defining our core values.
Core values are where happiness resides.
Only 1% of the worlds population have looked at their core values. We hear about values of nations and corporations. But we know now, that knowing our core values leads to a happier life. As long as we live by them.
How? Core values define our character. The absolutes. Why we feel and act the way we do. They direct purpose, commitment and motivation. When we live outside of core alignment. We struggle. Feel dis-satisfied. Then we search for external methods of happiness. Resulting in temporary satisfaction. It becomes a cycle of addiction. Because when we are unhappy, our search for contentment drives our behavior.
Why it is important to have core values defined when we are talking about our bodies?
It is the foundation of our internal happiness. But it is often overlooked in a hectic modern world.
And the western world isn’t bent that way. Doesn’t encourage us to search for meaning in our lives. To look internally for higher purpose. Eastern philosophies touch on core values. But western cultures went another route. Wealth, material items, a bigger house, Hollywood!
All external methods of satisfaction. With distorted images of what a body should look. Bombarding us each and everyday.
This external method of short term satisfaction creates stress. Because it never fulfills our heart. Keeps us searching for something else “external” that we must be missing. Illusions that that a new pair of shoes, will make us happy. The i’ll be happy when illusion.
Fact is, wealthy people are no happier than the rest of us.
Weights relationship with happiness?
Why are so many human so unhappy with their body?
Are skinny people happy? I think not. Being too skinny can also be body image. And it is just as unhealthy as obesity. Is it an illusion that skinny people are happier.
Its’ all in the mind. We are what we think. When we think we look great. We feel better. Get a compliment. We feel better. Therefore it may be a self-love, self-esteem and self-worth issue.
So how do we change? And lose weight too! First we need to look inward. Know what we really want. And that is not enough. We must discover WHY it is important. If we want to lose a few pounds. We must understand why. That answer, will help us achieve our goals. The “how”.
Part of the solution is: Empowerment. Core values. Support. Connection! Have an achievable plan. Accountability. Resources. And above all, learning to love ourselves. All of us. Not just the parts.
It is a mental set of many generations that is fueled by unattainable expectation and warped senses of reality.
With children dieting by the age of 8. I would say we have a major crisis on our hands. And it isn’t just a body image problem.It’s a being human problem. Most human beings are all so fragile. We may mask our feelings. Compensate our realities. It always come back to one thing. Happiness.
There are other missing elements.
Not understanding the psychology behind the pleasure centers of the brain. Sabotage. Self- destructive behavior. Missing the cues between being thirsty or hungry. Material distraction. Feeling unloved and that we don’t belong. All part of our early psychological evolution. Understudied and undervalued psychological foundation.
begin with basic psychology. Some deep thinking exercises. Where we can safely explore, process and heal. Then we can move. Get unstuck! Shift. Transform our thinking and ourselves.
- It’s almost always about emotional pain.
- Root causes, where the baggage originates and we forgive…
- Get support. Connect with people that encourage you
- Let go of outdated models and images
- Learn core values. Gain the knowledge of who you are. At the deepest level of existence
- Practice gratitude. The victories
- Give back…
- Pay it forward
- Focus and pursue
- Knowing the outcome is achieved
- Self-Love, honor and respect
Losing weight and loving your body can be a beautiful journey of self discovery, recovery and defining happiness.
Until we speak in person. Stay well