Mother Theresa once said, humans suffer because..

.. we have forgotten our connection to the divine.

Connection makes us feel safe, gives us a sense of belonging, and when we feel distant from ourselves or others, our inner safety triggers engage.

And right now, I am experiencing both my ability to suffer and may ability to find peace of mind, in my connection to God.

As part of my ongoing healing process, I have found the greatest relief in my spiritual practice. Embracing it, breathing it and in my connection to my spiritual self. I have always prayed and had a belief in something more, even though I never did belong to a church.

One practice is my bedtime gratitude ritual. Dear God hear my prayer, thank you for…. And I delve into the ordinary things we could take for granted.

I once heard


I have opened my experience to acceptance, sadness, allowing uncertainty, , find peace, embody gratitude and grace.

These are old processes, long before man stood tall, or evolved a cranium containing a Neocortex, an ancient reptilian brain processes warned us of potential danger outside the cave.

And more evolutions take place, inside our brain, as we age. We know them as the terrible two’s, the rebellious teen, Saturn returns and mid-life crisis. But what are they really? Natural evolutionary steps in brain development.

Different ages are meant to teach us and allow us to process different things. As we age, we may find that the work we do, leaves us dissatisfied. But what if we could think of it another way. Find the excitement and promise in your graduating to the next level of your psychological evolution.

But what is holding us back, and we remain feeling dis-satisfied. Allow yourself to be curious. What am I feeling and why is it important? What could be the bigger motivation behind these feelings? Without resistance, allow the feelings to register inside your body.

This is a dissociative technique. Taking an emotion, then labelling it, then without resistance rest in the visualization of the sensations. Stay with this focus, without resisting it and simply breath long sow breaths and focus. The feelings naturally dissolve.

I even tried this with joint pain the other day. I exercise daily and sometimes my body hurts. Two nights ago, I began having sharp knifelike stabbing pain on the side of my left knee. They made me wince. I wanted to move my leg away as these pains pulsed, stopped and then returned with vengeance.

This time, I decided to try this letting go technique. I focussed on the pain, without resistance. I winced aaarrrg, and so I leaned in further and let the pain jab, stab and pulse. I maintained long slow breath and kept focussed on that spot and after two minutes or less, it went away.

My knee felt numb, like the muscles were so tired, but there was a non-sensation present. The absence of pain. This is the idea of dis-ease. It is the sensation that draws our attention, and then we make a choice.

Another technique is the one used by Brene Brown.

If you haven’t watched Brene’ Browns Netflix talk, I encourage you to. One of the big wins for me was “what is the story I am telling myself”. Because the experience we are having is often because we have filled in the blanks. We can laugh or cry about these stories, but they are there all day long. We are filling in the scenarios and possibly not even present in the event itself.

What we often think of as “our life” are the events that we are moving through. And yet, fundamentally our experience is simple unfolding inside our mind; a perception, filtered through all our past experiences, fears, patterns, cultural, and emotional pain.


IE: We feel triggered, and it may feel like your mind is tumbling through space, falling, spinning the drama that in many cases does not exist, except inside our mind.

We create stories about everything! Can you relate! Think back into earlier today or yesterday and what story were you telling yourself?

Why is it important? Because often these stories come along with blame or self blame. So, what insight can be drawn from this new or recalled wisdom?

And with this, possibly you are wondering if there are tools to self correct our story-making, bridge the external with internal, and there is.

The story that I have been telling myself lately. Possibly that I am alone, will I be lonely, can I manage the property, will I have the resources I require. I could go on and on and if I was to allow my mind to tumble through space, I could create a storm of emotions, because I could get triggered.

Once the emotional roller coaster crests the top, whoa…. Maybe it’s time to get some inner sight.

Inner wisdom can be accessed naturally through spirituality. We can resist our spiritual natures, but often, in times of crisis, we get down on our knees and pray. To what every higher power we choose, we may find ourselves looking for that connection.

It is a way to refocus ourselves, to do a “U”Turn as Brene says. Grounding of our emotions takes place by doing inner work. Inner training, inner bridge building and there are tools.

And after I listened to Van Jones podcast with Tara Brach and one fundamental of black theology I also say, Hallelujah anyways